Audio (TCP7, Day 14): Mettā Bhāvanā Finale

The final talk on loving-kindness meditation in this series — near/far enemies, and using visualized objects to keep the practice anchored in feeling, not just concept — followed by a full guided mettā bhāvanā sit aimed at self-guided practice going forward.

Sakya tradition · IBA Kathmandu · The Complete Path (TCP) 2026 · English · Talk + guided sit

For the full Sanskrit/Pali/Tibetan glossary and nine-stages reference table, see the Glossary and Summary for Morning Meditations.

Transcript

Okay. I am just giving some forewarning that we are about to begin. Is that a good beep or a bad beep? We are tested. Put your meditation in English. It wasn’t usually a lasting wind and I can listen for it. Very good. Okay. We are live. This is Radio IBA. So good morning dear friends. Welcome back for our penultimate morning meditation class.

Tomorrow will be our last session together this time here at IBA Kathmandu. Our sessions, part of TCP 2026, an exploration of śamatha-vipaśyanā and also the cultivation of loving-kindness as it is found among the four illimitable, so immeasurable minds.

My proposal today is that we indeed return to that cultivation of loving-kindness once again in the hope that we might leave the course with enough familiarity to self-guide in the cultivation of mettā, of maitrī, of kindness, friendliness, kinship even.

If not each of the brahmavihāras, these divine abodes, then at least mettā, this foundational practice which, as we have explored, indeed contains all the others in perhaps seed form.

Mettā, foundational to the immeasurable minds but also we might say foundational to the path itself as His Holiness so patiently reminds us at the beginning of each teaching session to give rise to a motivation that is not for our own benefit alone but extends that wish to other beings, that they awaken also.

And we know from our understanding of the Four Noble Truths that that awakening is none other than freedom from what? From grasping and aversion and from ignorance. And we have learned that mettā bhāvanā as one of the immeasurable minds is at one time a śamatha object. It is possible to enter into absorption.

We don’t have time to go into the exact technique here but it involves using the mental image of our teacher for example. And here we are reminded though that because in the Vajrayana our root guru is seen as none other than Vajradhara, him or herself, fully awakened, there is no need for mettā towards such a being.

So the recommendation would be to choose a teacher, someone who their virtue has inspired us, they have taught us with kindness, we have a deep respect for their learning, their insight, kind of a purity of relationship that makes them a suitable object for us to visualize and cultivate a flow of mettā towards this being.

But not only is this cultivation a special śamatha or rather it is special because it is also connected to wisdom. Eventually the understanding that this attitude of acceptance, non-clinging and non-aversion is the best we can bring to any aspect of our experience even to difficult sensation arising in the body or the mind during a meditation session.

It is also concretely the best antidote to aversion. It is written in the Mettā Sutta, the text that we learned was offered to those unfortunate monks who had been allotted a haunted forest for their rains retreat, if you remember, their practice disturbed by fear, anxiety. Once their cultivation of mettā began to bear fruit, there was no longer any space in the mind for those feelings of fear.

And we have learned how also applying this practice with wisdom prevents us also from falling into the trap of the near enemy of loving kindness, of mettā, of friendliness, kinship.

You will remember how we are encouraged when experimenting with the different canonical objects after the supporting object and ourselves, the dear being, not choosing the most dear being in our lives that one towards whom there is friendliness, love, kindness, care but also a tendency towards attachment, to clinging, to wanting something in return.

So in this way, skillfully applied, loving kindness, meditation avoids that trap of the first of the nīvaraṇas, kāmacchanda, sensual desire. And there are other, we might say, more powerful antidotes in the aśubha contemplation, contemplation of the non-beautiful. But again, we don’t have time in these sessions to explore those, perhaps another time.

And maybe also by way of just kind of an indication, a preview. Again, we don’t have time to explore in detail.

But the cultivation of mettā, once we have established that foundation, connecting with the felt experience in the body, in the heart space, especially perhaps at the beginning, making use of that supporting object, the kitten, puppy, duckling, perhaps each of us has already found the mental image that we find helpful in that first stage.

And then extending that same feeling throughout the body so that we become the first beneficiary of the practice, object number two, ourselves. And then, what is the next object? Who can remember? The dear one. Again, a being towards whom that feeling of connection and kinship arises spontaneously, not the most dear. Gently expanding that circle of kindness.

Established in that, we move to the neutral being. Still important that we can visualize them clearly, but not someone towards whom our loving kindness is spontaneous. Maybe we know this person in daily life can recognize them in the street, but we are not so touched by their fortunes and misfortunes as we are by someone in our circle, in our family.

And here we recognize that fundamentally they are no different from us or from a dear being. They also just wish for freedom from unpleasant sensations in body and mind. Gently softening that barricade, the barrier, the limit, breaking the limit, if you like, that normally would restrict the flow of our kindness towards another being.

And then and only then, having established that base, we move to the more challenging object. Because if we start with this most challenging object, it may take a long time for us to unmix those feelings. Even if we have the strong intention, the idea that this being be free from pain and suffering, free from anger, enmity, da da da da da.

It may be quite difficult for us to connect with the actual feeling in the body and mind as well. So that cultivation stays mixed. It’s not really softening or breaking any barriers there. The intention is good, but the feeling can take a long time to clarify. So here we start with the simpler, easy object and we know we can, what? Always go back to those to stay in connection with the feeling.

This is what brings the practice to life, the feeling. So there’s clearly some patience that is needed in that sense. We need to practice again and again and again. Luckily, the four immeasurables are right there in the beginning of our sādhana.

We get a reminder every day, maybe twice a day if we are diligent, so we can remember maybe and touch back into those feelings and that extension in those moments. And having established ourselves in that kind of fluency, this flexibility of mind, this readiness to embrace even neutral and difficult beings, we can say that we are ready for the next step in mettā bhāvanā.

And this is a very beautiful step, a beautiful phase of the practice, one that is practiced in the Southern schools on a daily basis, and kind of functions as almost a dedication of merit in and of itself. And I have a very fond memory of this practice in the monastery of Pa-Auk, Ta-ya, in Mo-mein, in Myanmar, where I had good fortune to study for some brief, too brief period.

But in the evening, all of the monks would go up to the sīmā meditation hall on the top of the hill, walking through the forest amongst the kuttis. Even sometimes there are fireflies dancing in the shadows of the forest. And everyone would sit and there would be a meditation practice.

And then we would chant this mettā bhāvanā chant, in which, on the basis of our capacity for extending loving-kindness to lots of different kinds of beings, then we begin to imagine spreading it out in space. So from the heart into the body, and then outwards into the meditation hall, into the forest around that neighborhood and landscape, in front and behind, to the right and left, above and below.

Does it sound familiar? This sense of spaciousness and all of the directions being accessible with the mind, and then we catalog all the different kinds of beings that that mind of love can encounter. And I will share that kind of list as we move into that part of the practice today, will be a guided meditation.

But the reason we need this first practice is because as that mind extends, you can see very quickly it will encounter beings that are not dear to us, that we don’t even know. And if the mind is not ready to embrace those, they will remain as little islands untouched by our kindness and care. But we have already trained to break that barrier, so it spreads unimpeded, without obstruction.

No room for anger, hatred. And in the Mettā Sutta, this is the line, just as a mother would towards her only child, so we cultivate this mind and heart of love, spreading it in all directions, above, below, across, without obstruction. So our visualization practice that we have already been cultivating will stand us in good stead. It’s good preparation for this kind of meditation practice.

And maybe we can say, vice versa, this style of loving kindness meditation is also a great exercise for us in our visualization practice. So unless there are any questions, I suggest we make the most of the rest of our time this morning to practice a guided meditation on exactly this topic. Does anyone have any questions, anything that needs to be clarified?

I will of course repeat the instructions as we go. But if there is something that has not made sense up until this point, I will check. So let us begin establishing that comfortable meditation posture, a stable base. Perhaps here more than in many other meditations, avoiding unpleasant sensation is quite important. We again don’t want our Mettā Bhāvanā to be mixed with twinges of aversion.

So we can maybe offer ourselves that first gift, kindness to oneself by making our sitting position extra comfy for this practice, extra cushions, making use of a chair, all of these kinds of support.

If our knees have a tendency to float high, we can place padding even there, helping us to have that sense of groundedness, of connection with the earth, safety, stability, relaxing the body but remaining active in our sitting so that sensation in the body is clear, allowing us to maintain space for in-breath and out-breath, avoiding collapsing in our posture.

The straightness we emphasize is from the front, not leaning to left or right, because the spine has natural curves, which we allow to remain intact, opening in the shoulders, allowing them to relax down and away from head and neck, opening in the heart space as well, because we will be breathing with the heart in this practice.

And having established this foundation in the physical body, establishing also that foundation in the heart and mind, our motivation, not just for this being, do we practice, but for the benefit of many beings. There may even be a particular being that we would like to invite to practice with us. And we can visualize them seated beside us even as we do in the refuge. Why not?

Bring them along, and established in that physical foundation, that motivation, also the clear intention for this session, Mettā Bhāvanā, cultivation of kindness, of care, friendliness, kinship, and beginning now to gently recollect awareness back to the body.

Setting aside sounds distant and close by, other sensations in the body not related to the flow of in-breath and out-breath, wholly returning to this very moment, setting aside thoughts of past, anxieties about the future, meeting the breath in the body, just as we find it here and now. Relaxing the whole body and letting go of distractions.

Breathing in, aware of in-breath, meeting the feelings of the breath in the body, with the curiosity, attentiveness, no need to change the breath in any way, long or short, deep or shallow, rough or smooth, the breath as it is to these feelings of the out-breath, curiosity, continuity, beginning, middle, end, just as we find it.

Relaxing the body, calming the mind to the feelings of the breath, that continuity, beginning, middle and end. Eventually, established ourselves in that familiarity with the breath, knowing that this is our anchorage, our safe harbour, the place we can always return to.

The island within, invite you to gently begin to shift awareness down into the heart space, meeting sensations there, just as we find them also.

Spaciousness or density, hardness or softness, roughness, smoothness, coolness or warmth, or even a subtle vibration or pushing, perhaps not a particular sensation we feel, we can name, but nonetheless resting with awareness now in the heart space, allowing that sensitivity to deepen, to clarify, with the heart, as it were, the body, letting go of distractions, so that our attention becomes ever more continuous, uninterrupted.

And having established ourselves with that familiarity, sensitivity, we can begin with the first of our objects for mettā-bhāvanā, supporting the arising of that seed of kindness and care in the heart, the being, perhaps, a baby animal, a kitten, a puppy, a duckling, that being towards whom our kindness, our care, our wish to protect from harm, arises from its own side, spontaneous, by breath,

tracking, feeling in the heart space as perhaps it begins to shift slightly in response to that mental image, that imagining, perhaps a little more spaciousness or warmth or light or softness, perhaps nothing that we can name, but trusting in this process nonetheless that here, for sure, is a human heart capable of love, and here is a being worthy of it, allowing that mental image to deepen and

clarify, that feeling also to steadily become clearer, not giving rise to frustration if this takes time, and we can even harmonize that mental image with the feeling in the body and that intention that this being, vulnerable, fragile, in need of care, be free from pain and suffering, free from anger, enmity directed towards it, source of so much suffering in the world, may it carry itself, body

and mind, in ease, tranquility, imagining we can offer that safety to this being in this very moment, this embrace of light and warmth radiating from the heart space, imagining the benefit it would feel in body and mind, safety at last, able to relax, sharing those feelings in our own body and mind here and now, relaxing, letting go of tension at last, aware of that feeling in the body arising

in response to this mental image, and knowing we can always return to this part of the cultivation if our practice begins to lose its flavor, its sensation in the body, becoming abstract or conceptual, but continuing now with the next phase of this bhāvanā, this emergence, none other than this very being oneself, breath by breath tracking feelings in the heart space, giving rise, if it is

helpful, to the mental image in the space in front of oneself, perhaps as a child, just like that supporting being, vulnerable, fragile, subject to ups and downs in life, in need of care, and whether or not we feel that we received that care at certain important moments in our life, we can imagine the possibility here and now to offer that embrace, that light and warmth radiating from the heart, embracing ourselves as a child perhaps, harmonizing that feeling and visualization with the heartfelt wish that this being also be free from pain and suffering, free from oppression.

I carry myself, body and mind all in happiness, imagining the benefit that this embrace would have, a sense of relaxation in posture, of calmness and happiness in the mind, perhaps a gentle smile on our lips, our tears dried, no need for sorrow, directly sharing the benefit in body and mind in this very moment, relaxing, letting go, breathing in, aware of in-breath, having established this

foundation, knowing we can always return to this or an earlier step, continuing now with the next object, the dear one, giving rise to that mental image, again not the most dear, avoiding that trap of clinging, breathing out, allowing that mental image to clarify, harmonizing the feeling in the body, with that mental image perhaps of this dear being as a child, and that heartfelt wish that they

also be free from pain and suffering, free from oppression, anger, enmity directed towards them, that they carry themselves, body and mind all in happiness, visualizing the benefit, directly sharing it in body and mind in this moment, breathing in, aware of in-breath, continuing to train the mind in this fluency, flexibility of heart and mind, knowing we can always return to a previous object if

we wish, but continuing to soften the barriers that normally limit the spreading of that heart, mind of love, with the mental image of a neutral being now, someone we can clearly visualize, but towards whom we do not feel strong attachment nor aversion, as we breathe out, allowing that image to clarify, recognizing that this being also was once a child just like us or our dearest, vulnerable,

fragile, in need of care, worthy of nothing less than love and kindness also, breath by breath, imagining being able to share that with them now, radiating from the heart space, that light and warmth, embracing this being also, harmonizing feeling, image, intention, that this being be free from pain and suffering, unpleasant feelings in body and mind, free from oppression, anger, enmity directed

towards them, that they carry themselves body and mind all in happiness, imagining the benefit, sharing in the benefit, in body and mind, relaxing, letting go, breathing in, aware of in-breath, gently giving rise now to the next and last image from our series, this time a more difficult being, one towards whom we perhaps may have a tendency to give rise to aversion rather than kindness, not the

most difficult we can imagine though, slowly building capacity, imagining this being not in their role in which perhaps we perceive them to cause harm to ourselves or to other beings, but also as a child, fragile, vulnerable, just like our dearest ones, in need of care, imagining that we can offer that care to them now in this embrace of light and warmth, radiating from the heart space,

breathing with the heart as we imagine the benefit for this being, the safety that they feel, relaxation in body and mind, a smile on their lips, their tears dried, harmonizing that image with the feeling in the body, sharing in the benefit, and that heartfelt wish that this being also be free from pain and suffering, free from anger, enmity, that they carry themselves, body and mind all in happiness.

If it helps, we can even imagine them holding that first being that we use as support for our practice, the kitten, the duckling, the puppy, whatever helps to keep in touch with the feeling in the heart, room for anger, hatred here, and having established ourselves in this cultivation, this softening and breaking even of the barriers that normally limit the spread of our love and kindness.

Breath by breath we can once again imagine that same light and warmth spreading out from the heart space into the rest of the body, the shoulders, the neck and head, the arms, the hands, the torso, front, back, sides of the body, the belly, the lower back, the pelvis and the legs left and right, the feet left and right, embracing the whole body from the tips of the toes to the crown of the head and the tips of the fingers, in that light and warmth of kindness.

Breathing with the whole body and having established ourselves in that sensitivity also, why be limited to this body, exploring the possibility breath by breath to allow that embrace to spread outwards from the skin into this space that we share with other beings, friends on the part, in front, behind, to the right and left, above, below, spreading outwards from this space into this institute,

this compound, this neighborhood, encountering more beings, human beings and other than human beings also, allowing that embrace to spread still further into this neighborhood and landscape, this city nestled in its valley in the Himalayas, this region and continent, this hemisphere even, encountering countless beings, human beings, other than human beings, those endowed with breath, with individuality, large and small, seen, unseen, awakened and not yet awakened, male, female, in the air, in the seas, on the earth, countless beings, those known and dear to us, many that are unknown to us and even some that we perceive may cause harm to others.

Here we see their vulnerability also and imagine that we can embrace any being without exception, with this light and warmth of kindness and care, radiating from its epicenter in the heart in all directions, throughout the cosmos even, unobstructed, above, below, across, no room for hatred or enmity in this heart-mind whatsoever, may all beings, myself included, be free from pain and suffering, unpleasant sensations arising in body and mind, free from oppression, hatred and anger directed towards them, may all beings everywhere without exception carry themselves in ease and freedom.

Reviewing as we conclude, with gratitude to our friends who have waited patiently outside, please feel free to come in and with the time that remains if we have perhaps one question, knowing that tomorrow, in our last session, we will have a short meditation and then more kind of discussion and sharing, so there will be extra time for that later. But does anyone have a question or comment?

Ashley, please. So you had a lot of analysis come up with that, and so the question was very helpful, and then I started thinking about also being for students to generate loving kindness and compassion, even those towards and in the options, and then transferring that to one’s self or a living’s self. This is a fascinating question, thank you.

So to be clear, this kitten duckling puppy instruction is non-canonical. There is not a record of the Buddha suggesting ducklings for this practice, but it is something that contemporary teachers have found helpful. And the usefulness that you describe maybe is something that for me highlights just how innate loving kindness is for human beings.

That actually, if we just make the eyes a little large and the body a little bit fluffy and cute, we can even give rise to loving kindness towards inanimate objects. And in fact, whole industries, Walt Disney comes to mind, have been built on this capacity that we have, and the soft toy industry, we are made for love in that sense.

So this is something that we would need to experiment with for ourselves to see if it’s useful, but the invitation to that auxiliary object is one that comes from teachers who have found it useful for their students.

So if we can find an object that is useful for us also, I think by all means experiment, but it’s worth being aware that this will not allow us to enter the jhāna, that in fact canonically or commentarily, not only does the being for entry into the jhāna need to be a living being, they need to be still alive.

So that’s a very interesting, perhaps metaphysical contemplation we could get into, but for the purposes of our practice, in that first phase, my sense would be whatever helps the feeling come alive, whatever that looks like for us, and for us to experiment and be ready to change the object if it’s not working, to find the skillful means for ourselves.

So yeah, good luck, and yeah, maybe in the departure lounge of your next airport there will be a fluffy creature that catches your eye, and you will notice, wow, this art is made for love and kindness, it even can extend it towards something made from polyester.

So, good luck, and yeah, may this spaciousness and goodwill be a beautiful container in which we can welcome our Vajra brothers and sisters into the shrine room, and also with which we can welcome these beautiful and precious teachings from His Holiness for these last moments that remain.

Thank you, and have a lovely day, and thank you to our translators also, and just a reminder, yeah, so last session tomorrow, with some more time for questions and answers, and reflections.